Overwhelming Joy

How immensely wonderful it was that the morning after attending a bible study in which we focused on God's sovereignty, emphasizing that He was, has been, and is always in control of all things, I finally heard some good news from my mom.

For the past eight months, we have been living a life that was more full of uncertainty and dread than ever. While my family escaped a horrible situation that we had been in for years (I had been moved out for about four months by this time), we found new troubles waiting in the aftermath. Let me just say that my mom is the strongest individual I know. She has been through so much in her life, yet she has been a testimony of faith to myself and my brothers nonetheless. I am so incredibly blessed to have her as a mother, because if it wasn't for her example of steadfastness, I might have lost my own faith long ago.

It's difficult as humans to remember that God's plan is perfect, despite the hardships we may undergo in life. We want to take control, and when things go wrong, we cry out, wondering what happened. I find myself struggling with this all the time, doubting and scrambling for control, and I am subsequently humbled by God every time. Psalm 42:5-11 is a section I return to frequently to remind myself of this:

⁵ Why are you cast down, O my soul,
    and why are you in turmoil within me?
Hope in God; for I shall again praise him,
    my salvation ⁶ and my God.

My soul is cast down within me;
    therefore I remember you
from the land of Jordan and of Hermon,
    from Mount Mizar.
⁷ Deep calls to deep
    at the roar of your waterfalls;
all your breakers and your waves
    have gone over me.
⁸ By day the Lord commands his steadfast love,
    and at night his song is with me,
    a prayer to the God of my life.
⁹ I say to God, my rock:
    “Why have you forgotten me?
Why do I go mourning
    because of the oppression of the enemy?”
¹⁰ As with a deadly wound in my bones,
    my adversaries taunt me,
while they say to me all the day long,
    “Where is your God?”

¹¹ Why are you cast down, O my soul,
    and why are you in turmoil within me?
Hope in God; for I shall again praise him,
    my salvation and my God.

So I am now full of overwhelming joy: my family is out of danger, my mother can live free, return to school, and live her dreams happily; God has again shown his endless mercy despite our own shortcomings. We cannot understand what He has designed for us. We can only cling to Him in times of joy and suffering and rejoice in the peace that only He can bring. As the Psalm says, "I shall again praise him, my salvation and my God". And I am certainly praising Him.